I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
