I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
