i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
