I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
