haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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