Dual....:-)
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
