good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize