We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
