I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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