I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
you never un-have a 4some
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize