I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
