Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
