If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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