I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
