Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
