I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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