try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
