can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
