I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I lost the right to judge tonight
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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