what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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