I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize