I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
