oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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