Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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