but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize