I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Randomize
