omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
