whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
