I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
