no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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