It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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