I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
