Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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