I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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