hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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