i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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