glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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