it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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