I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize