Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
