Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
