Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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