office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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