if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
