And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
