I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
you have to choose: penises or morals?
she pinky promised me she was 18
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
