Having a random hookup so left but love u
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
