used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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