You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
