Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(251): View more from Alabama

I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed

Fav 14 1180 4444
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(352): View more from Florida

You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.

Fav 12 5371 948
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.

Fav 45 1353 10090
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(970): View more from Colorado

I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking

Fav 8 2932 1533
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(252): View more from North Carolina

there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone

Fav 6 2693 939
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(651): View more from Minnesota

College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.

Fav 3 1137 729
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(908): View more from New Jersey

he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward

Fav 4 1709 934
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(947): View more from Michigan

if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee

Fav 1 850 337
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(925): View more from California

I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches

Fav 1 51 15
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